Tonight, Chloe wanted to go to the dance studio to learn some exercises and techniques to help strengthen the muscles behind her knees. This is not her usual lesson time and I don’t think there was even a ballet class tonight. She has been experiencing pain behind her knees for a few months now. I took her to the doctor in January and he told us he thought it was a tracking problem aggravated by overuse. When we thought about it, this all started during Nutcracker so it made perfect sense.                                                       “What can we do?” I asked the doctor.                                                                                                                                             He had Chloe wear knee braces for a few weeks and currently, the pain is beginning to lessen so we are trying to see if she can correct the techniques that led to this injury before going to another doctor (specialist). Anyway, I went early tonight to watch and see if there was anything I needed to remember to help her practice at home between lessons. The studio was quiet and there were only three girls on the floor (Chloe and two high school girls). I sat in the darkened lobby and watched through the doorway as the girls moved their arms and legs… beautiful, so graceful and controlled. I sat there in silence for about thirty minutes and I was thinking about how long Chloe has taken ballet and how much she loves it. Not once in all these years has she ever mentioned not going to ballet or wanting to try other activities… and there have been opportunities. Believe me, sometimes the drama of all the stage mamas is overwhelming and I have to remember that I am there  for Chloe.In fact, a few years ago I worried that maybe she should take a break and try other things. She never did.

So on  this very cold, rainy night as I sit in darkened silence, I admire the smallest ballerina on the floor and I think about how lucky I am as a mama(with drama or without) to have lived this life and find myself at a place of awe and wonder, totally amazed by grace, dedication and passion.

Advertisements